Confessions of a Singletine



 Ah lovely, Valentines Day is here, yes, that is sarcasm you detect! As someone that is more single than a Pringle (they live in a tub, you cannot be a ‘single pringle’) and being less of a mingle than those minty chocolates (what happened to them by the way?!) I have spent the day begrudgingly selling chocolates to boyfriends who ‘forgot’ the date and to women who wanted to get a card on discount…

So, here is my guide to help everyone that will be ‘celebrating’ Singletines Day along with me this year, I like to nickname V Day ‘EFF OFF! Day’ - why? Well simply because it’s the one day a year where us singles openly tell smooshy couples to eff off. Here’s the top ways to distract yourself from those godawful couples. Singletines, I salute you.

  1. Order a take out.
No meal out for us tonight, no way – let’s not be reminded of our current relationship status, no. Get yourself a menu and order yourself a big fat greasy take out, plus there’s the bonus that no one will see you in a restaurant and assume you’re comfort eating, I do not comfort eat, simply make myself happier with a plethora of meals.

  1. Dogs are a Singletines best friend.
Nothing makes life more complete than a pup. I personally believe a French Bulldog or a Pug are more than adequate at showing love and affection, their adorable little faces will light up your life. However, careful you don’t go overboard; no one likes a crazy pug person.

  1. DO NOT DRINK
Alcohol is strictly forbidden today, we all know what will happen, you’ll promise to just have the one however, one glass (bottle) of wine and a few voddy’s later you suddenly decide to give your ex or your dream partner a ring or even just a text, well, we all know the disaster that goes on from here, so no alcohol!

I really hope this helps, you can do it Singletine! I just sure hope next year you can tell your story of how you used to be a Singletine!